


I Won't Let Go Of You

by lagseeing1123



Category: Naruto
Genre: M/M, Suicide Attempt, suicide prevention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-15
Updated: 2015-09-15
Packaged: 2018-04-20 20:40:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4801532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lagseeing1123/pseuds/lagseeing1123
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sasuke goes to the rooftop, his secret place where no one will think of finding him, except this time, Naruto was right there, sitting on the edge.<br/>Warnings: Mature, Hurt/Comfort, Yaoi, SasuNaru. They are 22 years old and in their fourth year of BSPT in this story.<br/>Disclaimer: Naruto is owned by Masashi Kishimoto. This is a fan fiction and I do not make any profit out of this except for the reviews I may get which really makes me happy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Won't Let Go Of You

I Won't Let Go Of You

Sasuke Uchiha was a studious person. He always got the highest grades and every time he was asked a question, he never seemed to fail when answering them. He was the top of the class, just as expected from any Uchiha. Everyone wondered how he manages to do it. No one really sees him study like the other honor students who stay up late in the library reading books. And he always seemed to just disappear right after class so that even if the other topnotchers wanted to study with him and hopingly find out his secret to getting his grades that high, they never got hold of him.

He was a loner as one would simply put it. It wasn't that he was too arrogant that he didn't want anyone in his company but rather he just enjoyed the solidarity. People envied him and some think he's weird but Sasuke didn't care about that. And so as the last period which was their Pathology class ended, out went Sasuke with his books and on to his secret place.

It was only 3:30 and there was plenty of light. He hurried up the spiral staircase to the rooftop of their building. Sometimes, it made Sasuke wonder why whenever he went up there, he never bumped into someone. There was no rule that the rooftop was forbidden so that boggled him. Not that he desired company. He was better off alone as he secretly studied under the shade with just the light of the sun and the cool breeze.

But he never imagined that on that day, as he opened the door to the rooftop will he find Naruto Uzumaki, his ex-best friend and secret crush since they were college freshmen, sitting there on top of chest-high wall surrounding the whole rooftop, which was built to prevent anyone from falling. But it seemed like it wasn't doing its job.

At first, Sasuke felt scared for him because that was a dangerous thing to be doing. It wasn't just dangerous. It was deadly. A simple slip would mean death and no one in their right mind would sit there. In the initial taking of the situation, that's what he thought but then again, he knew that Naruto was one for doing stupid and reckless things and this must be one of those.

He walked towards the blond, making his footsteps loud enough to be heard to call forth his attention. He didn't want to scare the blond by calling him in surprise and make him jump in shock to his death accidentally. It was 60 feet above ground and no amount of parkour training would keep you alive from a height like that.

He saw Naruto turn his head around. A sparkle of light from the blond's face was what he instantly saw. And not two seconds after, the blond turned his head away from Sasuke's view. Tears were what probably shone.

"Dobe, what are you doing here? And why are you sitting there on the edge?" he asked.

"Why are you here anyway. teme? Shouldn't you be at home studying?" the blond responded, not answering the Uchiha's question.

"I asked you first. But anyway, this is where I usually study after class. Now, what are you doing over there? You should really get away from the edge dobe if you don't want to get a suspension or worse, accidentally kill yourself." Sasuke warned him.

"Heh." he heard Naruto chuckle nervously. "Then maybe I'll just stay here then. You know, death really seems inviting right now."

And it was at that moment that Sasuke realized that this was no prank nor any stupid thing Naruto would just do. It was serious. He was contemplating suicide. And as intelligent as he was, Sasuke had no clue on what to do in a situation like that.

"Why would it be inviting then?" Sasuke asked. At that time, he was really thinking that Naruto was going to be killing himself. There was no doubt. He was his ex-best friend and he knew him more than anyone. Naruto wouldn't joke about something like that and if he did, he wouldn't do it alone. Naruto didn't know that Sasuke usually comes to the rooftop so it was impossible that he did that just so he could pull a prank of scaring a random person who happened to find themselves lost in the rooftop by making it look like he was going to kill himself. Sasuke didn't know what to say but somehow he must make Naruto see otherwise and prevent him from taking his own life.

"It's inviting because if you die then you won't have to suffer anymore. You won't have to feel pain, to live in this world where all the other people hate you. Where even though how hard you try you just can't pass those freaking hard exams and you don't want to go home just to say to your parents that you failed them. Where your own parents don't even want to look you in the eye because you're a failure and because you're just a sick, disgusting, no good faggot. And you won't have to hope on someone you can never have." Naruto said. His voice was cracking and Sasuke could hear pretty well the sobs in between them.

"So because of that you want to die?"

"Yes. It's not like I'll be missed. I'm guessing people would even be happier if I were gone. They hate me anyway."

"You guess? You're not really sure. So why would you want to kill yourself for something you're not sure about?" Sasuke asked him. If he wanted to stop Naruto, he had to make him think twice about what he was going to do. He had to make him see otherwise.

"You know what Sasuke, just leave me alone. You don't want to see someone die right in front of your eyes, do you? So just go down and leave me to my misery." And so even with that intent, Sasuke's plan didn't work. So he tried a different approach.

"You're not gonna kill yourself." Sasuke stated.

"What? Do you realize what you're saying? You are actually saying that I can't do it?" Naruto asked him, as if the blond himself was taking it as a challenge.

"You're crying. If you said that it would be better to just die then why not put on a smile because you're happy it's all gonna end. That your pain will finally stop."

"Don't taunt me Sasuke. I may just have to prove to you I can do it. That I can jump right here, right now in front of your eyes." Naruto said, sounding determined yet Sasuke could hear the slight faltering in his voice.

"Now that's just stupid. You'd take away your life just so you can prove to me you can do it? It's not worth doing something if you're not alive to even realize you've done something. If you die, would you know that you're dead? Tell me, when you fall asleep, do you know that you fell asleep. When and how you fell asleep?" It was all that the Uchiha could think of as a comparison. And he was praying that somehow, it would make Naruto stop and think rationally about it.

"No, I don't know. But that's what's good about dying. You don't know. It would be like you didn't exist. Because you'll never know anything once you're dead." the blond retorted. They had different point of views as to suicide and whatever Sasuke said, it wasn't going through the blond.

"Well if I were you, I wouldn't kill myself." Sasuke stated. This time Naruto turned to look at him.

"What do you know? You've never been in the same situation as me. You've always been Sasuke, the rich, devilishly handsome, honor student who is perfect in almost any way. All the girls want to be with you and all the guys wants to be you. There's not even anything that would make you want to kill yourself. So why are you telling me what to do when you don't even know what I'm going through?"

"Yes I wouldn't know. But I wouldn't want you to kill yourself because I don't want you to die." And so he said the straight-out reason why he didn't want Naruto to die. "Naruto, I'm sorry that we had a falling out in our friendship. I know it's largely my fault. But please, don't do this. I can't have a friend die. I can't have you die."

"And now you're apologizing because you see that I'm about to kill myself. You never even tried to build our friendship back. Do you know how hurt I was every time you turned me down when I asked if you wanted to hang out? You were my friend since high school and I just can't believe you would throw all that away." the blond said dejectedly.

"I wanted to make things back as they were before but I didn't know how." Sasuke confessed.

"Stop explaining yourself. We all know guys like you don't want to hang out with a fag and loser like me. You probably didn't want to become friends with me ever since you learned that I like guys. Can't have your reputation dirtied, can you?"

"Naruto it's not like that. We had our falling out even before your secret was outed." the Uchiha defended. And he was telling the truth. Naruto being gay wasn't the reason. In fact, after learning that all Sasuke felt was deep regret for what he has done. Because he ruined their friendship for something so stupid.

"You're wrong Sasuke. We didn't fell apart. You fell apart." Naruto pointed out. "But you know, sometimes I think it was for the best because somehow it would have been difficult it we had stayed together as friends. Because it's not like I can have you the way I wanted."

"What do you mean?" Sasuke asked, his mind a little bit perplexed from what Naruto has just said.

"For a genius you can be so dense. I love you Sasuke… more than a friend should have."

And that statement caught Sasuke off guard. Naruto loves him. The person he loves, loves him back. And it was Sasuke who broke their friendship when it could have gone the other way around. He was the one Naruto spoke about when he said that if he died, he wouldn't have to hope on someone he can't have.

"I thought that this secret would have stayed with me. But I'm going to die anyway so it's not like I can see your loathing face every time we pass by each other in the halls because your faggot ex-best friend has a crush on you." Naruto stood up. And this actually made Sasuke think that Naruto was going back but he was proven wrong as Naruto instead walked further to the edge, half of his feet now hanging in the air.

"Goodbye Sasuke. Even though it didn't turn out to be what I wanted, I'm still glad I got to be with you." And with those last words, he let himself fall to his death.

"Naruto, no!" Sasuke cried as he sprinted as fast as he could. His senses have been heightened to an extreme level. It was as if he was seeing slow motion. The moment Naruto inclined his body, Sasuke's nerves fired signals to his legs. He had to save him. Even if he himself goes with him, he had to. Naruto can't die. He mustn't die. Sasuke needed him. And he's not going to let him die.

And so he lunged, grabbing hold of Naruto in the arm before all was too late.

"Grrrr!" Sasuke grunted in pain as the weight of Naruto was placed all in his shoulder, his right hand exerting all its strength so that the blond wouldn't slip and his left hand grabbing for dear life to the post that was erected on the edge of the rooftop. He didn't have the build to do it but his mind overpowered his body, the adrenaline rushing to his muscles. He can't let go.

"Sasuke, let go of me! Please, you'll die." Naruto pleaded.

"There's no way I'll let go of you. Not even if my arm gets dislocated. It's either you go with me or I go with you."

"But why? Why would you go this far for a lost cause like me?" Naruto asked, not understanding at all why Sasuke would do this for him.

"Because I love you! Now get a hold of yourself and help me pull you up." Naruto found himself lost for a moment. What Sasuke said was almost impossible to believe that he just stayed still, not knowing what to do. He was hanging 60 feet above the ground and his mind just went blank.

"Naruto, please." Sasuke pleaded in a desperate cry and somehow it managed to shake Naruto off his daze.

Naruto stared at Sasuke's face. It was in a mixed show of emotions. Pain, sadness, fear, regret… but most of all, his face showed that he was telling the truth. That he does love Naruto.

The blond looked down to the ground and then this feeling he never had before suddenly erupted from his stomach. Fear. Not the fear from dying. But fear of losing someone you love and loves you back. Of losing the chance when it was right in front of you. Sasuke loves him. And that's more reason enough for him to live.

So he used his free arm to grab on the ledge and his legs to push on the wall. This lifted some weight out of Sasuke and made it easier for the Uchiha to pull Naruto back up. As soon as they landed on the rooftop, Sasuke tackled him in a crushing embrace as if he never wanted to let Naruto go. The raven was crying, something that Naruto has never seen.

"Usuratonkachi!" Sasuke yelled. He threw a punch to Naruto's left cheek which had the blond down to the ground. "Don't you ever do something like that again! If you had died, I wouldn't have known what to do. I might have jumped too just because I don't want to lose you."

"I'm sorry Sasuke. I'm sorry." Naruto said. The punch hurt like hell and it was sure to swell later but this was Sasuke, and Naruto somewhat felt happy as he reminisced the last time they had a fight. He missed it. Naruto sat up and hugged the crying Uchiha. It was at this time that the tears also started to flow down once again from the blond's eyes. And though even if both of them were crying, it was clear they were tears of joy and not of pain and sadness that the blond had just minutes ago.

"No. I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I broke our friendship. I'm sorry I was a coward. I fell in love with you and I was afraid of rejection. So I distanced myself, thinking that it was the best thing to do before my feelings got deeper. If I had just known you felt the same way. But even if I didn't know, I shouldn't have done that. It's just, I love you so much Naruto. I was afraid. I'm sorry." Sasuke tried to say in between his sobs.

"I should have been there for you… through all those times you felt like giving up. I should have been there to tell you that I'm always there to help you through it. And ignorant as I was, if I hadn't been regularly coming here to this place you would have been dead. And I don't know if I could live with that."

"I'm sorry Sasuke. I'm sorry." And indeed he was. Naruto didn't know what else to say so he just repeated those same words over and over again as if even a thousand of them wouldn't be enough.

"Naruto. Don't ever scare me like that again." Sasuke demanded, looking directly at Naruto's blue eyes.

"I won't, Sasuke." the blond promised. And Sasuke really did hope that he wouldn't do anything like that ever again.

Once their crying has stopped, Sasuke placed his hand on Naruto's right cheek. Then, taking a breath he leaned in forward, only to be met by Naruto as they shared their first kiss. The two of them had never felt anything as sensual and electrifying as when their lips met. Their hearts beat even faster and they could feel each other's beating as they pulled even closer. Their stomachs felt like it was going to explode as if millions of butterflies have awakened inside them. And most of all, they felt happiness, now that they know they love each other and have reconciled their broken friendship.

"Let's go home." Sasuke said as he broke off from the kiss, and also needing a moment to breathe because for a few seconds he forgot to as he was captured by that feeling the kiss has given him.

"Just like old times?"

"Yes, just like old times." Sasuke gave Naruto a kiss before they stood up, missing the blond's lips already. Naruto was about to walk towards the door but Sasuke pulled him into another yet more passionate kiss. It just seemed that he couldn't get enough of it. He gripped Naruto so hard that it would have left marks. But he didn't care. He wanted to do this for the longest time and now that he could, he wasn't going to wait even longer.

"I love you so much." he spoke in between his kisses, the kisses that the blond was eagerly returning.

"I love you too. Don't leave me again Sasuke." Naruto asked.

"Never. It will be too hard to be away from you again." And Sasuke will stay with him. The earlier events have instilled in him this great fear of almost losing the one he loves the most next to his family and himself. He almost lost his other half and it would have left him dead to lose the part that completed him.

"Thank you, Sasuke. I would have been dead if you didn't save me." Naruto said.

"You wouldn't have been in that position if I didn't do the things I did." Sasuke contended, trying to make Naruto see that it was Sasuke's fault.

"The both of us have our own faults but maybe we should stop blaming ourselves."

"I guess we should." Sasuke agreed. Naruto was right. He shouldn't be thinking about faults because now, it was a thing of the past. It's the present he should think about now and their future together. "Now, let's go. You have the removals for Pathology and Pharmacology next week, right?"

"Yeah. I'd probably fail though." Naruto said sadly. "No one's ever passed a removal exam. They cover the entire subject and you need to get a 75 out of 100 to pass. It's impossible for someone like me to pass. But I can't fail too because I can't afford to take remedial classes. My parents are going to kill me."

"Why don't we stop talking about anything that involves you dying, huh?" Sasuke suggested. He really had enough for the day and what Naruto needed was a little more positive thinking. "You will pass. I'll help you study and make sure you pass. You'll show those doctors what you can do."

"Thanks Sasuke." Naruto smiled. If you ask Sasuke, that smile was probably the cutest thing he has ever seen. And Sasuke knew that it was that smile that drew him to Naruto ever since the first time they met in high school.

"So I was thinking, since we now know that we feel the same way about each other, does this mean we're boyfriends?" Sasuke asked.

"Do you want us to be?"

"More than anything."

"Then you are officially my first boyfriend, Sasuke Uchiha." Naruto stated with pride.

"And you are mine, Naruto Uzumaki."

THE END.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: It has been a while since I've written a SasuNaru story. I don't really know if there are many suicide themed fics out there because I myself don't want to read anything that has a successful suicide in it because that would make me cry (just like The Suicide Note by gretty23.) So this one that I've written has a happy ending.
> 
> The idea came to me during a lesson in Psychiatry about suicide. I've planned on writing this since the first week of January but never had the time to write it until now. And for Pathology and Pharmacology, a lot of my classmates failed that subject so I chose to use those subjects here.
> 
> The hardships of Physical Therapy. It's really possible for one to commit suicide because of failing grades. I am now a 4th year BSPT student, just a month away from internship, but when I was in second year, a PT student from the year below shot himself in the head because from what I heard, he failed too many subjects. And I also saw this video of a PT intern from a different school jumping to his death. As in real video of him jumping, but not including the fateful landing. They say that the reason for the suicide was because he really didn't want to take up PT and it was too hard for him. It so happened that one of the new faculty was once a co-intern of that guy who jumped and told us that the guy was supposed to pass this paperwork that day but didn't show up in the clinic. Then they heard that he already killed himself.
> 
> So, if you're a parent, don't try to force your kid on taking a profession they do not want. And if they are not what you expect of them to be, let's say they happen to like a person of the same sex, accept and support them because you don't know what could happen if you act on it the wrong way. Just saying.
> 
> Leave a review if you have a few minutes to spare.


End file.
